[Guest Post] Top Ten Reasons I’m Sleeping with Him and Not You

The time has arrived for the first guest post. PantyParade has plenty of first hand experiences and, I don’t think she’ll mind me saying, offers that “cougar attitude” that is becoming more and more prevalent in Europe after the lexical coining on the West Coast. This contribution tastily ties in with my post on casual flirting and is a damn good rule of thumb. I have my own thoughts on each point, but I’ll just let this wash over you as I did me –  I look forward to your comments. If you want more from PP then follow the links; don’t forget that to share it via the helpful little buttons below.

If you ever wondered what it was about your suave co-worker or that guy at the end of the bar who seems to have to swat women away—here are some reasons we give them our phone number and give you the cold shoulder.

1.      You reek of desperation while he exudes confidence.  He’s not necessarily the guy who commands the room with his presence, but he’s comfortable in his own skin.  There’s no fidgeting, he’s not scanning the room every five seconds, and he’s leaving his phone alone.  On the other hand, you’re drooling for attention.  Instead of playing it cool when I glance in your direction, you’re panting with anticipation.  Relax, buddy.

2.      He doesn’t go in for the kill right away.  You, on the other hand, waltz right over the second you see me and throw out a line that makes me blush.  Yes, you have my attention, but it’s the wrong kind of attention.     

3.      Shoes.  Women appreciate men who pay attention to their footwear.  Sneakers should never be worn to a bar unless you are there for a running group.  If you do wear flip flops on the weekend, make sure your feet are properly clean and trimmed.   

4.      When he starts a conversation, it’s clever and brief.  There’s no bravado, there’s limited cockiness, and there’s an exit strategy.  When I meet men out and about, I like the attention to a degree, but I prefer to have a man make initial contact, get me to laugh or smile, and then melt back into the crowd.  Let me know you’re around, and then let me come to you.

5.      If I give him my phone number he actually calls me.  I met a cute, sexy guy at a dive bar on Sunday while watching football with some friends.  We flirted a bit, but he was not overly attentive. I liked that.  Deciding he would be a prime candidate for an afternoon fuckfest someday, I made an effort to say goodbye and gave him my card.  I could tell he was flattered by the gesture, but he did not call.  He dropped the ball.  His loss.

6.      Endorphins.  There’s no getting around chemistry.  If it’s not there, you’re not getting laid. Sorry.

7.      He’s pleased with my attention instead of intimidated by it.  I’m a leggy blonde with a killer smile and exuberant personality.  My boobs are real AND spectacular.  In other words, even though I’m a fading beauty, I’m still the kind of woman who turns heads wherever I go.  I’m used to it.  If I choose to flirt with you, be happy about it, polite, and calm.  When men get flustered or overly shy (a little shy is kind of cute) that’s a huge turn-off, and I’m ready to look for cock somewhere else. 

8.      He’s picky about his women.  Women pay attention to details.  Just like the piece about shoes, women notice who you are talking to when we meet you in public.  We want to be part of a select group—not clustered in with the riff raff.  I’m not advocating that you’re rude to anyone.  Everyone deserves to be treated kindly and with respect.  Just understand that when you talk to the pretty girls, other pretty girls take note. 

9.      He’s not falling down drunk, loud, or otherwise obnoxious.  The men I go home with are not the life of the party or the clown.  They hold their liquor and have a smooth demeanor.  I like it that they can capture my attention without making a sound.

10.  When we find ourselves flirting, he doesn’t talk about sex, show me pictures of his cock, or ask me over-the-top sexual questions.  Once we’ve broken through the sexual tension and are actually talking, the men who take me home with them never once mention sex.  They may touch my arm, smile knowingly, and tease me to no end—but they do not steer the conversation to their cock.  They wait and let me do that.  They let me come to them and get in the mood on my terms at my pace.

The man/woman game takes some practice.  Not everyone is born charismatic.  See what you can do with these tips and let me, Panty Parade, know (mailto: offgothepanties@gmail.com) if any of these suggestions helped you in any way.  I sure hope so!

 In the meantime, Boy’s post on how to flirt (https://boyonthenet.wordpress.com/2013/09/06/why-you-should-flirt-all-the-time/ ) is another great resource for making it with the ladies.  Relax, have fun, and stock up on the condoms.  Cheers!  

Want more PP? There are two related posts below that you most certainly might like. All that remains to be said is a big thanks! Remember that you can make your own submissions here, and they can generally be under your own terms.

Tired of Sorority Girls? Find a Cougar How-to

The Curious Good Girl


  1. Panty Parade · September 10, 2013

    Thank you for posting my little article, Boy. I look forward to your contribution on _Off Go the Panties_ later this week.

    • boyonthenet · September 10, 2013

      It’s typing itself up as I…er…type. Thanks for your submission. I look forward to reading more of yours.
      Boy x

      • Panty Parade · September 10, 2013

        Awesome! I’m so excited!

  2. Pingback: [Guest Post] Top Ten Reasons I’m Sleeping with Him and Not You | Off Go the Panties
  3. dcardiff · September 10, 2013

    Great advice. I’ll keep it in mind next time I go to a bar. Perhaps we’ll meet. Who knows?


  4. Panty Parade · September 10, 2013

    You never know!

  5. Panty Parade · September 10, 2013

    How’s that guest post coming, sexy? In the meantime, I’d love to hear what you think about my advice on getting girls to want to give head. http://wp.me/p2Hs5Y-ls

  6. Pingback: Guest Post: 8 Misconceptions About Desirability | Off Go the Panties

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